Devil of a Morning

On a miserable early winter day in Indiana, waking up to pounding rain and wind that screams through the open fields near my house like a banshee, the only thing you can think about when waking up is how bloody cold I felt. Ugh. Mornings like this make me want to crawl back under the warm covers and tell the world to screw off, but I was good and dragged my sorry carcass to the kitchen to make breakfast. Needless to say with a windy day like this all I could think of was fried potatoes and eggs.

Fried potatoes and eggs.

Tools:

Frying pan

Knife

Spatula/flipper

Lid for the pan (if you don't have a lid, get out some aluminum foil and cover the top, shiny side down)

Ingredients:

1 medium potato, sliced into 1/8th inch thickness

2 large eggs

olive oil (not extra virgin olive oil, that's salad dressing, not cooking oil)

salt/pepper

1 cup of pipping hot coffee

LETS DO IT!

Ok, first thing to do is chug the cup of coffee so you are awake enough to not cut your fingers off. Fingers + knives + sleepy = a bad wake up. Once the cup is in your belly, slice the taters (see potato if you don't get the Hoosier/hobbit reference) into thin ovals. If you get the potatoes too thick they will take FOREVER to cook.

With the taters sliced up, put the pan on the burner on medium heat and pour in some olive oil. I use just enough that it covers the very bottom of the skillet I'm using. I don't care if you have one of those spiffy 'non-stick' skillets, you still need some fats to cook the potatoes in, otherwise you will just have dry crusty potatoes and a HUGE mess at the bottom of your now ruined non-stick skillet. (BTW: the spray they use on those skillets is very CRANKY, you need to make sure you ALWAYS use plastic utensils in it and NEVER send it through the dishwasher. The material they use on those skillets is toxic if it starts to flake off from getting scratched.)

Layer the potatoes on the bottom of the pan flat and spread out over the entire pan. Don't crowd the food, otherwise it won't brown right. Cover the pan with the lid/aluminum foil and turn the heat down to low. This will let the potatoes brown without some jerk (aka: me) poking it constantly with the spatula. Also the lid will seal in the moisture coming off from the potatoes and begin steaming the taters in their own juices as they fry in the bottom of the pan.

Spend the next ten minutes creatively doing things that need to be done. Drink more cafe, tie a bell around the collar of your cat, make your cat dance while singing a silly song (my cat 'loves' that), play with knives, shave, play with fire. I think you get the idea. Do anything but play with the pan of taters.

Take the lid off of the taters and they will be a nice orange/brown on one side. Flip them and push them into the corner. Raise the heat back up to medium/medium-high and crack your two eggs into the empty side of the pan. I was taught that if you crack them one at a time and count to fifteen out loud. No, I'm not making you look like an idiot, I'm letting the pan get warm again so they can fry in the happy olive oil at the correct temperature. If the oil is too cool it will not work right and the eggs might stick to the bottom of the pan.

Salt and pepper the eggs now (because salting/peppering after they hit the table = too late) and fry the eggs on one side of the pan to your preference. Much like the potatoes, leave them alone UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO FLIP THEM!!!!!!! Trust me, the eggs need to form a happy cooked skin otherwise they will turn into a mess.

Once they are all done, put the eggs and the taters on the same plate and condiment as you see fit. Hate to break it, but being a native Hoosier I tend to add ketchup to both the eggs and the taters, so forgive my heathen tendencies.

An evil trick with the still hot pan with left over olive oil is getting a piece of bread out and throwing it into the pan, making an olive oil soaked piece of toast. Hmmmm...toast.

Well with a belly full of warm starches and proteins I have the energy to go through the entire day and lowers the chance that I snap in a Indiana fall/winter induced fury caused by lack of common sense during a wind storm. Tonight might be ensalada mixta, one of my favorites from Espana.

Bien Camino!